Just Edit My Work Using The Teacher Feedback

it is not about how many words you write here , you only edit my work according to the teacher feedback below 

                                                                                               ===== feedback ========
Introduction- Very high comparison score, however, you have referenced each source that you have leveraged. Be sure to create cohesion by paraphrasing your work within your own voice and topic area. Include outline, aim within the introduction, but you've identified key concepts.  

2. Your reference list needs attention.

3a. Regarding methods, make sure you include key information such as databases used also (how you found the sources understanding the type of reputable source you have defined you're after). 

3b. Some information changes could be valuable regarding organisation. Reduce being too sidetracked by specifics E.g when speaking about indigenous mortality rates, keep it general to simply mortality rates are changing, where, and how this impacts the economy. Also, talking about ageing population trends, speak about how this has impacted the economy more (you've also included labour mobility as a solution option, but explain better how this mitigates current issue that exists). Furthermore, focus on the fertility rate as well, but talk more about how it impacts the economy (e.g  due to low rates influencing a greater rate of ageing population).  Organising your information into and within each different section is key. You have good content here to work with.


Just Edit My Work Using The Teacher Feedback

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